When Harry Met Sally... is a 1989 American romantic comedy film directed by Rob Reiner and written by Nora Ephron. Starring Billy Crystal, Meg Ryan, Carrie Fisher, and Bruno Kirby, it follows the title characters from the time they meet in Chicago and share a drive to New York City through twelve years of chance encounters in New York, and addresses the question "Can men and women ever just be friends?"
Ideas for the film began when Reiner and Penny Marshall divorced. An interview Ephron conducted with Reiner provided the basis for Harry; Sally was based on Ephron and some of her friends. Crystal came on board and made his own contributions to the screenplay. Ephron supplied the structure of the film with much of the dialogue based on the real-life friendship between Reiner and Crystal. The soundtrack consists of standards from Harry Connick Jr., with a big band and orchestra arranged by Marc Shaiman. For his work on the soundtrack, Connick won his first Grammy Award for Best Jazz Male Vocal Performance.
Columbia Pictures released When Harry Met Sally in selected cities, letting word of mouth generate interest, before gradually expanding distribution. The film grossed $92.8 million in North America, and was released to critical acclaim. Ephron received the BAFTA Award for Best Original Screenplay, as well as nominations for the Academy Award, WGA Award and Golden Globe. The film is ranked 23rd on AFI's 100 Years... 100 Laughs list of the top comedy films in American cinema and number 60 on Bravo's "100 Funniest Movies". In early 2004, the film was adapted for the stage in a production starring Luke Perry and Alyson Hannigan. In 2022, the film was selected for preservation in the United States National Film Registry by the Library of Congress as being "culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant".
Plot In 1977, cynical Harry Burns and optimistic Sally Albright graduate from the University of Chicago. Sally gives Harry a ride to New York City because he is dating her friend, Amanda. During the journey, they debate their differing views on life and relationships. Sally rejects Harry's claim that men and women cannot be friends because the man will always want to have sex with the woman. At a diner, Harry tells Sally she is very attractive, prompting her to accuse him of making a pass. They part ways in New York at the Washington Square Arch, never intending to see each other again.
Five years later, in 1982, Harry and Sally encounter each other at an airport. Harry can not immediately place her, while Sally remembers him unfavorably. Sally has recently begun dating Harry's acquaintance Joe, while Harry reveals that he is engaged to Helen, which Sally considers uncharacteristically optimistic of him. Harry suggests that he and Sally become friends, but cannot disprove his earlier argument about the impossibility of male-female friendships, and Sally walks away.
By 1987, Helen has left Harry for another man, leaving him depressed, while Sally and Joe have broken up. Harry and Sally later run into each other and discuss their failed relationships. Sally explains that she and Joe never married because he believed relationships deteriorated after marriage. She insists that she is unaffected by their separation. Harry and Sally admit they disliked each other when they first met but agree to become friends, gradually developing a close, honest platonic relationship. Both eventually begin dating other people again, without success.
At a New Year's Eve party, Harry and Sally realize they are becoming attracted to each other but do not acknowledge it. They arrange a double date with their respective best friends, Marie and Jess, only for Marie and Jess to fall for each other immediately and soon move in together. While shopping for a gift for them, Harry and Sally run into Helen and her partner, which disturbs Harry. Later, seeing Marie and Jess argue over decorations prompts Harry to break down and bitterly warn them that even happy relationships can end badly. Sally admonishes him, and they briefly argue before reconciling. Some time later, both begin dating other people, though their feelings for each other remain.
One night, Sally tearfully calls Harry after learning that Joe is getting married and wonders why he never wanted to marry her. Harry goes to comfort her, and they end up having sex. Sally is initially pleased about the encounter, but Harry, who habitually leaves women soon after sex, becomes uncomfortable and leaves early the next morning, embarrassing her. They later describe the encounter as a mistake, but Sally is visibly hurt by Harry's reaction, and their friendship becomes strained. Three weeks later, at Marie and Jess's wedding reception, they argue when Sally insists the night meant something and resents Harry's attempts to dismiss it. By Christmas 1988, despite Harry's efforts to apologize, Sally tells him she can no longer continue their relationship or be his "consolation prize".
On New Year's Eve, Sally attends a party but remains unhappy. Harry wanders the streets alone, returns to the Washington Square Arch, and reflects on his relationship with Sally. Harry runs to the party and catches her as she is about to leave. He declares his love, but Sally initially refuses to forgive him, believing he is just lonely. Harry lists the things he loves about her and says that, now that he understands his feelings, he wants their life together to begin as soon as possible. Three months later, Harry and Sally are married.
Cast
Billy Crystal as Harry Burns, a cynical political advisor Meg Ryan as Sally Albright, an optimistic journalist Carrie Fisher as Marie, Sally's best friend Bruno Kirby as Jess, Harry's best friend Steven Ford as Joe, Harry's neighbor and Sally's ex-boyfriend Lisa Jane Persky as Alice, Sally and Marie's friend Michelle Nicastro as Amanda Reese, Sally's friend and Harry's college girlfriend Kevin Rooney as Ira Stone, Helen's new lover Harley Kozak as Helen Hillson, Harry's ex-wife Estelle Reiner as female customer
Production In 1984, director Rob Reiner, producer Andrew Scheinman, and writer Nora Ephron met over lunch at the Russian Tea Room in New York City to develop a project. Reiner pitched an idea for a film that Ephron rejected. The second meeting transformed into a long discussion about Reiner and Scheinman's lives as single men. Reiner remembered, "I was in the middle of my single life. I'd been divorced for a while. I'd been out a number of times, all these disastrous, confusing relationships one after another." The next time they all met, Reiner said that he had always wanted to do a film about two people who become friends and do not have sex because they know it will ruin their relationship but have sex anyway. Ephron liked the idea, and Reiner acquired a deal at a studio.
For materials, Ephron interviewed Reiner and Scheinman about their lives, creating the basis for Harry. Reiner was constantly depressed and pessimistic yet funny. Ephron also got bits of dialogue from these interviews. Sally was based on Ephron and some of her friends. She worked on several drafts over the years while Reiner made Stand by Me (1986) and The Princess Bride (1987). Billy Crystal "experienced vicariously" Reiner's (his best friend at the time) return to single life after divorcing comedian/filmmaker Penny Marshall and in the process was unconsciously doing research for the role of Harry. Tom Hanks, Richard Dreyfuss, Michael Keaton and Albert Brooks were all offered the role of Harry Burns but all of them turned it down, with Brooks feeling the movie was too reminiscent of Woody Allen's work.
During the screenwriting process when Ephron did not feel like writing, she would interview people who worked for the production company. Some of the interviews appeared in the film as the interludes between certain scenes featuring couples talking about how they met, although the material was rewritten and reshot with actors. Ephron supplied the structure of the film with much of the dialogue based on the real-life friendship between Reiner and Crystal. For example, the scene depicting Sally and Harry in split-screen conversing with each other by telephone and simultaneously watching television and channel surfing was something that Crystal and Reiner did every night.
Originally, Ephron wanted to call the film How They Met and went through several different titles. Reiner even started a contest with the crew during principal photography: whoever came up with the title won a case of champagne. In order to get into the lonely mindset of Harry when he was divorced and single, Crystal stayed by himself in a separate room from the cast and crew while they were shooting in Manhattan. The script initially ended with Harry and Sally remaining friends and not pursuing a romantic relationship because she felt that was "the true ending", as did Reiner. Eventually, Ephron and Reiner realized that it would be a more appropriate ending for them to marry, though they admit that this was generally not a realistic outcome. Reiner related that the film originally had a sad ending before he met his second wife Michele Singer, which inspired him to change the ending.
When posed the film's central question, can men and women just be friends, Ryan replied, "Yes, men and women can just be friends. I have a lot of platonic (male) friends, and sex doesn't get in the way." Crystal said, "I'm a little more optimistic than Harry. But I think it is difficult. Men basically act like stray dogs in front of a supermarket. I do have platonic (women) friends, but not best, best, best friends." Reiner's mother Estelle and daughter Tracy both played roles in the film.
Gloria Gresham was the costume designer; Harry's cream-colored cable-knit sweater with jeans and sneakers, and Sally's boxy autumnal tweeds became iconic, much-duplicated looks.
Katz's Delicatessen scene
The film featured an iconic scene in which the two title characters are having lunch at Katz's Delicatessen, a well-known Jewish deli in Manhattan. The couple argue about a man's ability to recognize when a woman is faking an orgasm and Sally claims that men cannot tell the difference; to prove her point, she vividly fakes one as other diners turn to watch. The scene ends with Sally casually returning to her meal as a nearby patron (played by Reiner's mother) places her order, deadpan: "I'll have what she's having." When Estelle Reiner died at age 94 in 2008, The New York Times referred to her as the woman "who delivered one of the most memorably funny lines in movie history"."Estelle Reiner, 94, Comedy Matriarch, Is Dead" . The New York Times. October 29, 2008. This scene was shot "over and over again", and Ryan demonstrated her fake orgasms for hours. Katz's Deli still hangs a sign above the table that says, "Where Harry met Sally... hope you have what she had!"
The memorable scene was born when the film started to focus too much on Harry. Crystal remembers saying, We need something for Sally to talk about,' and Nora said, 'Well, faking orgasm is a great one,' and right away we said, 'Well, the subject is good,' and then Meg came on board and we talked with her about the nature of the idea and she said, 'Well, why don't I just fake one, just do one? Ryan suggested that the scene take place in a restaurant,Ephron (?) speaking on BBC Radio 4 programme When Harry Met Sally At 20 (aired August 27, 2009), about 17 mins in and it was Crystal who came up with the scene's classic punchline – "I'll have what she's having." In 2005, the quote was listed 33rd on the AFI's 100 Years... 100 Movie Quotes list of memorable movie lines. Reiner recalls that at a test screening, all of the women in the audience were laughing while all of the men were silent.